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“I have languished, not lived …” by Nikolai Gumilev 🇷🇺 (15 Apr 188626 Aug 1921)
Translated from the Russian by & Earl D. Sampson
I have languished, not lived
Through half of my earthly life,
And now. Lord, You appear to me
In the shape of an impossible dream.
I see the light on Mount Tabor
And I feel a great remorse
That I have so loved the land and the sea.
The whole deep sleep of existence;
That my youthful powers
Have not submitted to Yours,
That the beauty of Your daughters
So acutely torments my heart.
But really, is love but a little red flower
That has only a moment to live,
But really, is love but a small flame
That is easily extinguished?
With this quiet, melancholy thought
I will somehow drag out this life;
But You look to the next one,
I’ve ruined one as it is.